If you’re a parent, you would have read about 1,001 articles and
about a few dozen books on how important it is for kids today
have confidence. Confidence says everything. When kids have
confidence, they will learn better, they dare to go for things
they believe in and they dare to make mistakes and learn from
them.
Regardless of how much it all sound like hogwash (I know some
people from the old school of thought sure thinks that
confidence is OVER-RATED), when you have confidence in
something, someone…yourself, you dare to forge ahead and take
roads no one have ever taken before. This is not something hard
to understand so, I won’t go into it yet again on how to raise
kids with healthy self-confidence. I think Dr. Miriam Stoppard
has done a credible job in telling you how to build confidence
in kids.
Now, how about adults? If you’re like me, you’re raised by
parents who, essentially, belong to the old school of thought.
Let’s just summarize what ‘old school of thought’ means. People
from the old school of thought basically focus on repetition and
obedience. The more you obey, the better. The less you speak up,
the better person you will be. In the old school of thought,
confidence ranks right below finishing off every piece of
scrambled egg on your plate.
TO be fair to my parents, I didn’t get my rebellious nature from
nowhere. I got it, I think, from my dad. He didn’t conform to
the norm, neither do I. So, I am raised by 1 old school of
thought and 1 rebel. The rebel of those days is today’s hero.
They had the confidence of telling people off whenever they were
wrong, instead of keeping quiet and hoping that someone else
will tell the person off. So, in actual fact, people who had
confidence are rebels today! Amazing, isn’t it?
If you are one of those with low self-confidence level, it’ll
show in the way you speak, the way you walk and through your
entire body language. It doesn’t take a genius to figure this
one out, Your body is controlled by your mind. And if you don’t
have confidence in your mind, your body behaves that way.
Everyone around you will react in a certain way towards you
because of the way you behave. For example, people with low
self-confidence level, you will usually pull your shoulder back,
you hang your shoulders, your head will droop forward and you
will tend to shuffle between one foot and the other.
You no longer have the opportunities like your children have.
For kids, in order to build self-confidence, you provide them
with a secure, supportive and understanding environment. You
praise them when praise is due and you offer constructive
criticisms in order for them to improve themselves. You no
longer have that because you’re an adult. So, you’re going to
have to learn how to do this yourself.
Relax and de-stress. People with low confidence level are often
people who are stressed out. They’re so harsh and strict on
themselves that they tend to bring their own self-confidence
down without anyone else helping them to! So, the first thing
you will need to do is to relax and de-stress in the
evening….after work or three times a week. Whatever works for
you. Yoga is good, you can try that if you want. Self-hypnosis
is fab too. But if you don’t have a budget for all those fancy
classes, switch on some relaxing music and just sit there, with
your legs cross, concentrate of breathing. Focus on every single
breath you take and feel the anger and the confusion dissipate
with every single breath you exhale.
It’s going to feel a little bit awkward in the beginning, but
after a couple of tries, I am sure you will get this right.
Focus on the positive Take a good look at a book entitled ‘A
woman in your own right’ by Anne Dickson. The book will teach
you how to acquire skills that helps you focus on the positive
side of things even in the most adverse situations. The author
takes you on a ride of self discovery and adventure that will
help you find extremely simple and practical solution to living
life with full confidence.
Let’s also look at things this way, you can’t lack confidence in
EVERY SINGLE ASPECT of your life! If you’re not confident in
front of an audience, let’s focus on your behind-the-scene
skills. If you’re not a good speaker, let’s focus on your
writing skills. Whatever you lack confidence in, drive your
focus AWAY from the subject matter. And then refocus your
attention on whatever that is that you’re good at.
Mingle around Even if you’re not a social butterfly (very few of
us are actually BORN social butterflies), in an effort to build
your own self-confidence level, you should consider attending
more parties and mingling around with the crowd. If you’re
Successful, congratulate yourself and give yourself a presence.
If your self-confidence level shows, try again at the next
party. Do NOT give up until you’ve successfully mingles around
with at least 5 strangers at one party.
Paying attention to your health and looks I know it sounds
corny. The desperate housewife seeks attention from others
because she lacks self-confidence…blah blah blah. But it’s not
all hogwash. It’s true. The more attention you pay to the way
you look, the more confident you become. You don’t have to be a
supermodel to look good. The way you dress, coordination of
outfits, hair, makeup, accessories, your body language…they say
a lot about you…about your self confidence level.
Go ahead and try to be as gorgeous as you want.
Exercise They say it all the time and I am beginning to sound
like a broken record. Go exercise and you’ll feel a boost of
energy that you won’t believe you are capable of. Trust me, I am
talking from experience. People tell me to go join a gym and I
will feel better and I say, “Go get a life! I don’t need a gym
to feel alive!”
But you know what? It’s true. After all of that, I have to eat
my words. Joining a gym changed my life – it changed me from
inside out. I feel livelier, I have energy, I walk faster, talk
louder, speak with more confidence. And it all adds up, like a
layered cake.
Conclusion I know it sounds either impossible or not
necessary…but trust me, it will do you a world of good. When
you’re more confident, you’re capable of achieving much more
than you can imagine. Why give a half-hearted effort at living?
Give it your all, right
Marsha Maung
http://www.articlesbase.com/self-help-articles/adults-building-self-confidence-2481.html
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I am particularly looking for subjects that will teach me to build my character as an individual and give helpful advice on how to be more social and outgoing. I know this may seem like like a silly question but I am quite shy around my peers and have come to a point where I need to start networking more and really break out of my shell. So, please only serious answers.
Losing my Virginity by Richard Branson
Richard Branson Book Review
The flamboyant Virgin entrepreneur from the United Kingdom shares some of his business Successes, world adventures, and personal background in his bubbly autobiography. "Losing My Virginity: How I’ve Survived, Had Fun, and Made a Fortune Doing Business My Way" is a very appropriate title as it is exactly what the book is about.
::: Losing My Virginity Autobiography Review
The Secret
Rhonda Byrne Book Review
The book promises you all the money you want, good health, great relationships, and an abundance of happiness. The Secret is to think positively, to become a magnet for the goal you desire, to use the law of attraction to draw your dreams closer
Not talking about seklf-help books for depression, anxiety, or any other sort of condition but just regular self-help books that masy help with social ability, Success, etc.
Which ones have helped you the most?
Learned Optimism by Martin Seligman
The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. Covey
A General Theory of Love by Lewis, Amini, and Lannon
and many others
Book review site: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GaKUEemAiZ0 http://plurbis.com Book review site: “Sacred Contracts” by “Caroline Myss” *** plurbis.com
Self help and personal growth: http://plurbis.com Book Review Site: “Exactly as I am” by “Shaun Robinson”
http://plurbis.com Book Review Site: What’s Your Favorite Book? Here are Mine… Plurbis.com
http://plurbis.com download your free Tao Te Ching, Art of War, Bhagavad Gita, and Hua Hu Ching. Then upload your favorite pdfs! – Book Review Site
Personal Growth and Self Help Book Review Site
“The power of now” by “Eckhart Tolle”
“Mental Resilience” by “Kamal Sarma”
“Creating a life you’ll love” by “Mark Chimsky-Lustig”
“People are idiots and I can prove it!” by “Larry Winget”
“Sacred Contracts” by “Caroline Myss”
Blink by Malcolm Gladwell:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D9WItSWeltM
Duration : 0:1:45
I’m looking to get a general idea of how many people would read self-help books. Can be about anything, psycology, relationships, emotions, depression, etc.
Yes, I have read Self Help Books on a whole variety of subjects. I usually browse through them rather than digest them carefully.
My cousin just dropped off a few audio books & self-hypnosis(thing) he says I should try them out. I’m willing to get them a try but I believe that if a person it gonna change & better themselves that have to want to change & don’t believe some CD’s are gonna change a person. Does anyone believe in this stuff?
generally speaking, if a person is going to buy Self Help books and tapes then they are wanting to change or they wouldn’t have bought them.
i know they work because i purchased them ,got rid of phobias and also got motivated to make the changes that i did.
none better than the books and tapes by Paul McKenna.it’s amazing stuff that most people would never be able to think of themselves.
the people who put out the most Successful CDs and books also know the most effective techniques that can help speed up change.
“No one has carried the concept of ’self-authorship’ forward more richly, or with greater use for the reader, than Marcia Baxter Magolda. Anyone interested in supporting their own, or others’, adult development will benefit enormously from this book.”
– Robert Kegan, Meehan Professor of Adult Learning, Harvard University, and co-author of Immunity to Change
Who am I? What do I want in relationships? How do I know what to believe? How do I manage the stresses of living?
This book is for you if you are in your twenties or thirties, looking for your personal compass in the face of changes and unexpected challenges in your life. Perhaps you are questioning the direction your life is taking, maybe disappointed in your romantic, personal or professional relationships, possibly unfulfilled in your work, or concerned about how to Successfully manage all the competing responsibilities of adult life. This book offers you a unique way to reflect on your life and use what you learn about yourself to develop an internal foundation what Marcia Baxter Magolda calls self-authorship that will re-center you, and provide you with a compass that you can rely on as you make your way through life.
Duration : 0:9:23
From www.BookVideos.tv – Fear is devastatingly real. All of us — at some point — have faced it. In fact, approximately one out of ten people has experienced a panic attack or a crisis situation. From fear of public speaking to fear of spiders, this feeling can prevent us from reaching our full potential. Large or small, the things we fear may seem insurmountable, but they’re not. How to Overcome Fear teaches you that the closer you get to your fears, the more you understand them and the more easily you can defeat them. Speaking from his own experience, Marcos Witt takes readers on a clear path toward following the word of God as a bridge to living a life of victory and freedom, without fear.
Duration : 0:2:26
Researching is important to all types of authors. It doesn’t matter whether you write how-to books, nonfiction, or fiction. Best-selling novelist John Grisham is a great example of a fiction writer who does his due diligence. Mr. Grisham travels all around the world learning about the cultures of the people and settings that go into his works. Because of his research, Mr. Grisham is able to accurately detail every bit of his stories. The amount of research you gather for your book is entirely up to you. Some writers like to research as they go, others like to stockpile mountains of data and keep only the best materials. Do what you feel most comfortable with.
Here are some tips that might help you conduct your research:
- Treat it like a job. The adage is that writing is 10 percent inspiration and 90 percent perspiration. No matter how interesting your topic is there will be days you just don’t feel like researching. Do it any ways. The quicker you get your research together, the quicker you get to write your masterpiece.
- Know what you need. It’s good to have some idea of the structure of your book before you start researching. If you simply write out the chapters you need to gather information for, you can go to your research center and collect only the materials you need. Authors who just go to a library and start pulling down books will waste a lot of time on material that will never make it into their books.
- Get organized; stay organized. When you collect materials, be sure that you know exactly where everything should be stored. A lot of authors lose valuable information when they misplace notes and research materials. Your work will go much faster if you organize your research to correlate with your writing.
- Collect quotes and artifacts. One great way to help your research along is by breaking up your bookwork with interviews. Spending hour after hour, day after day doing nothing but digging through books or microfiche can get pretty monotonous. Consider any necessary interviews a part of your research. Transcribe your quotes and add them to your research findings to get a sense for just how much information you’ve gathered.
- Your book is only as great as what gets cut. One of the hardest parts of being a writer is leaving out information. However, great books are filled with great information. Your best material will be watered down by everything that is not at the same standard. Don’t make the mistake of attempting to jam everything you know into your book. Be diligent in your research. When you are forced to cut good information from your book, you will know that you are on the road to creating a great book.
Danny Stooksbury
http://www.articlesbase.com/self-publishing-articles/authors-self-publishers-will-benifit-from-researching-678668.html
Ode/rant about self-help books and Dr. Phil